Watch me paint “Flying to Heaven” in under 1 minute (time lapse). This was for a children’s book called “Grandpa Smiles“.
Here we are, another Sunday will be soon over, and July too is gone. It’s now August and a new season is upon us. As we approach this upcoming week together, I wish you a productive and joyful experience- no matter what turmoil and fear is outside our doors. Spiritually, may we maintain focus and inner peace.
Like this blog? Please subscribe to receive e-mail when there’s something new.
This is a fictional landscape, just something from my imagination, but it was based on a real place in Northern Wisconsin. The place I was inspired by was a wooded area with a waterfall and a single picnic table nearby. There were no flowers, and the scene was slightly different from what I imagined here, but my painting expresses the general vibe for what that place was like.
It was a sanctuary, a hidden retreat from a family camp we were attending. The camp experience had been the wrong fit for us and we were anxious about the whole adventure. We escaped here to this place, to get away from the camp and think about whether or not we were willing to stay until the end. Even though we’d pre-paid for the organized activities for ourselves and our children, the situation felt dysfunctional and pressuring, not our style at all.
I don’t recall how early we left, but we didn’t stay as long as we could have and we dropped out of planned activities. Years later, my favorite memory of that time was when we escaped to the waterfall alone as a family. We’d never have seen that place if we’d not been feeling anxious and in need of a retreat.
Anxiety is defined as an unpleasant emotional state with feelings of dread. There are other definitions as well, including clinical disorders, but for the purpose of this blog post I’m focusing only on the occasional anxiety that is common to all humankind. We all have times when a situation is so miserable that we dread it, maybe even fear it. At the least, we feel stress and apprehension.
When we feel anxiety, it can be helpful to physically remove ourselves from the situation and find a waterfall. But, that’s not often possible! In which case, we can retreat to a spiritual waterfall, as in… calm ourselves into a state as close to “waterfall relaxation” as we can. And in this retreat, we may find lasting enjoyment. Sometimes a miserable feeling pushes us to escape to new positive experiences, habits, and lifestyle changes.
Maybe it helps to watch people like me paint relaxing art? Maybe music is therapeutic, either playing it or listening to it? Maybe physical exercise, a warm cup of tea, reading a book, or sliding under a weighted blanket for a nap is comforting? Whatever your spiritual waterfall is, during challenging times we need to prioritize ways to manage anxiety.
Remember that you aren’t alone. All of us suffer from the human condition of anxiety from time to time, while others may suffer from it chronically. It’s normal to feel anxious when the world feels chaotic, confusing, disturbing, hostile, dark, uncertain and frightening. Find your spiritual waterfall and restore your spirit.
Like this blog? Please subscribe to receive e-mail when there’s something new.
Watch me paint “Autumn Angel” in 2 minutes (time lapse)
Since today is my birthday, I searched for an oil painting I’ve done that represents who I am. At first, I thought of the most obvious choices, such as ones where I make a cameo appearance, like “Come to the Garden” or “Natalie at the Fountain“. I also thought of paintings that others say represent me, or my most popular signature pieces, but in the end, I decided to go with the one above “Autumn Angel“, who doesn’t look like me, and has not been seen by many people.
At the time, the piece was just to fill a project slot for the collection “50 Oil Paintings Inspired by Savannah, Georgia“. It was inspired by the statues and monuments of angels that tourists like to visit in Savannah’s historic cemeteries. I love the beauty and hope of angels and I decided to paint a “real” one based on likenesses and poses I saw in statues.
I wanted to connect with this oil painting, but I was surprised when I actually, deeply, did. The music especially had a profound effect on me. I watched my own painting video over and over. Something about it feels so sad, so bittersweet, yet loving, peaceful, and kind. Why? Why did I feel this way about this particular painting, when I’ve done so many pieces that were just another project to tick off my list?
Interestingly, this particular painting video was one of the ones attacked by a mob who sought to cancel it because the angel is white. They said she is an “Aryan angel” and therefore racist. Am I not allowed to paint figures who might look like my own heritage? (Irish) I have very fair skin that I cannot change. I had blonde hair when I was a young child that turned light brown, then very dark brown (nearly black) like it is now. I have green eyes. This is just the coloring I was given. I was not born “wrong”.
I have painted diverse skin tones over my career. I do not paint exclusively fair skinned persons. But that’s not really something I have to say. I’ve volunteered it because I want to show that I am experienced in a range of portrait styles, but not to defend myself against something I am not guilty of.
The unprovoked attack by the mob against my artwork was seen only by me. I simply disabled comments and stopped using that platform for new work. It was not a big ordeal involving crimes committed against me, like other situations were. This really was nothing at all… only a few anonymous hateful trolls. It could have become something more if I’d engaged with them, but I didn’t.
However, the incident stirred an expected response in me. I felt violated, as if my personal diary had been read and condemned. I felt protective of this art and didn’t share it much. Why did I feel such a personal connection to this particular painting? I’ve had to reflect on this to write today’s blog post.
While this angel doesn’t look like me, and while no one has given any attention to it as a signature piece of mine, nonetheless, it is this one that I connect with the most. It makes me feel powerful emotions and brings tears to my eyes. This is how I feel about the beauty of life in an ugly and hostile world, a world where joy and grief exist alongside each other.
I love my family so deeply that I cannot bear the thought of them in pain, in fear, or gone from me. The joy of loving them, juxtaposed with the fear of losing them (or them losing me) is what living full out is all about. We cannot have joy without an awareness of grief. Yet every day that we are blessed to share life’s journey is full, happy, and even if woven with trivial irritations or concerns- ultimately beautiful when we are brave enough to love.
Love is like this angel. God’s creation, the elements of nature, surrounds her; ivy is a shelter above her head and autumn leaves cushion her feet. She is not consumed by fire. Though the flames may rage, she remains beautiful and kind. She holds peace of spirit in her hand.
When I looked out my patio glass at this very second, I could see three, no FIVE, birds right now. Two of them are cardinals. The other three look to be finches. They were perched peacefully alongside each other, occasionally fluttering to change positions. They are still there, but continuously flutter and move, so by the time I finish this blog post they will have moved on. A hummingbird has now joined in, had a nip, and is already gone. This is how fast things move in the bird world of nature.
But there are times when I am among them, when I dare not breathe lest they fly away… when they trust me to stand very near them, sharing space in the natural world, where nothing matters except this moment. We are truly living when we stand in love, extending peace, when the flames of this world can’t consume us, and when God’s protection is over our heads and beneath our feet.
We are blessed to be alive another day, and for me, I’m marking another year. May we have many more years together, as you journey with me to reach my lifetime goal of 1k finished paintings. Happy Birthday to me.
🎂
Like this blog? Please subscribe to receive e-mail when there’s something new.
Watch me paint “Owl and Rabbit” in 2 minutes (time lapse), a landscape that is also available as two separate works “Owl” and “Rabbit“.
You may have seen my previous new painting announcements when I finished “Owl” and “Rabbit”. The final touch was adding the moon. Keeping the landscape simple allows the viewer to write their own story, giving the piece an air of mystery. The art is divided three ways (each animal as a separate work and the landscape as a whole as shown here). If one is a fan of owls, but not rabbits, for example… they can order the print that features just the owl. This was an experiment for me, and I liked how it turned out. I may do a 3-in-one landscape again in the future.
If you’re keeping track, I now have only 3 paintings left for the 2021 collection “50 Oil Paintings Inspired by Nature“. I’m getting excited now, as another set of 50 will be a wrap and I’ll start the new theme! Also, I got my new dress for the final show of 2021… it’s AH-MAZE-ing, darling, AMAZING!
Be passionate in all that you do. Let’s push ourselves hard to feel joy even when the world is doing its best to crush us with darkness. Spiritual and emotional strength leads to mental and physical protection from illness, exhaustion, and defeat. May we be powerhouses of energy and light, protecting ourselves as we shine for others. God bless you this day and always.
Like this blog? Please subscribe to receive e-mail when there’s something new.
Another new painting done! One step closer to my lifetime goal of 1k finished paintings! This is also another project done for this year’s collection. I have only 4 slots left to fill to close out 2021 with “50 Oil Paintings Inspired by Nature“! I’ll then start on the 2022 collection, another series of 50. When I have things planned out so far ahead it feels like time is racing by, as my mind is already living in 2022.
My next, and final show for 2021, is a holiday show that will debut in November. I’ve already begun work on that show and I’m so excited for Christmas because of it! If you’ve never seen my shows, they are variety acts that are performed live and then uploaded to this site. There is no editing (as in, the footage is only dressed up with titles, transitions, etc., but we are not “auto-tuned” or over rehearsed. It is mostly candid, organic in performance and style. There are no scripts or teleprompters).
I hope that you enjoy what my family and I do. I believe that there is a strong desire for authentic real voices, talent, and connection. REAL people who love each other, and share with the world what we love to do.
Like this blog? Please subscribe to receive e-mail when there’s something new.
Surrealism is an art style that combines unusual elements together to produce a dreamlike effect; merging reality with fantasy, simulating the subconscious mind. But sometimes paintings are just “a little bit” surreal. The unexpected, unreal, or dreamlike qualities may be so subtle that viewers of this style of art may not even be aware of it, and yet, they’ll probably sense that something is different that they can’t quite put their finger on.
In “Kitchen Devotions“, there are several elements in the composition that are unexpected. Why are the flowers in a food bowl? Why is one side of the curtain moving slightly, even though the window is closed and the other side of the curtain is standing still? Why are the walls that odd color and pattern? Why does the mug look like it was made by a pottery student? Why is the bookmark floating rather than in perspective? Why does the book look “ghostly” and blank? Why are the flowers spaced evenly apart and straight?
Artists who paint “freestyle” (painting an idea rather than prioritizing a careful, realistic technique), may inadvertently paint in a slightly surreal style. “Kitchen Devotions” was a freestyle exercise to paint whatever came to mind, without looking at a reference or planning ahead. This type of exercise is beneficial for any skill level of artist and may even emerge to become a favorite work or a signature style.
What I want to add today, is a different perspective on Distorted Reality. Rather than looking at it from the artist viewpoint of surrealism, what about when life itself feels surreal? These days I’ve been waking up after vivid, disjointed, and disturbing dreams. For a few seconds upon waking I’m not sure if the dream is real or not… and then later in the day, I may still not be completely able to sort the dream state from reality.
For example, yesterday I had a dream that I had flooded the bathroom of a house I’ve never seen before, but in the dream it was my house. I flooded it with clean soapy water, but I was still concerned that water had seeped inside the walls and would be trapped there to mold or cause water damage to the home.
Later in the day, I was cleaning the real life shower stall of this house, when suddenly I realized that a repaired spot in the stall had fallen out, revealing an open hole that had been apparently plugged with putty at some point. Now I had a real life concern that soapy water had gone into the wall!
Fortunately the hole was very small and I’d noticed the exact moment when the repair patch had fallen off. I cleaned and dried the area, texted my husband, and he stopped by the store on the way home from work to get putty. He re-patched it in seconds. It was really not a big deal, unlike my dream that had me standing in about three feet of water!
But, real life was a smaller version of the dream and it was unnerving to have dreamed something so similar just before it happened. I felt a lot of stress when I saw the gaping hole, even though it was small and turned out to be easy to repair. What a trivial psychic ability! Not much prophetic use for predicting minor anxiety-producing events that are quickly resolved!
However, there have been other times when my portent dreams were not trivial, and it was very sobering when the predictions of my subconscious mind came true. Dreams are sometimes prophetic, but not usually. Many dreams feel like nonsense, or are a boring play about regular life activities. Sometimes dreams are a confusing distorted mix of people and places from our past jumbled together with current places and places we don’t recognize- and maybe don’t even exist!
We might wonder what the purpose of dreams are, but usually we don’t think much about it… until we have an unsettling dream, a vivid dream, or a dream that feels like a portent. I’ve felt lately that life itself feels like we’re in a dream state. More and more, as we merge the surrealism of our sleeping mind with the distorted reality of 2021, it can be difficult to sort out the truth. What is real?
In dreams, we may fear things that aren’t real. Anything can be dangerous in a dream. In our waking life, do we ever fear things that aren’t quite real, or at least not at the level of danger that merits the terror that is conjured up? What is real, and to what degree should we fear the dangers of 2021? Who are the truthtellers? Who are the “experts”? Who do we trust? Who should we fear?
Perhaps my dream of flooding a home, causing lasting damage and dangerous toxins, when the reality was vastly different: one small hole that merely needed to be patched, is an example of a bigger paradigm. Sometimes we fear a flood when the problem is much more manageable. We may even have a fast and easy solution to repair the damage and resolve the problem.
The trouble is, we may not know which way things are going. Life may feel surreal. Is it a flood or a small hole? Does this situation merit a small amount of anxiety and stress, or fear and escalating terror? We may feel confused, disoriented, and exhausted. Conflicting perspectives reach our ears and we may not be able to sort out what is real.
If something or someone is driving fear using hostility, ridicule, and disrespectful, dehumanizing and tyrannical methods that are devoid of empathy, are full of control and manipulation, and possibly even frothing with malice, condemnation and discrimination against those who disagree, then fear isn’t real… not fully real. Because when fear serves a master, the driver is hate (deception), the opposite of love (truth). It is not loving to be unkind, to use bribery or punishment to coerce people (rather than information, patience, and evidence). It is not love that whips up fear. Hate does that.
So when fear hits you from a source of hate, it is NOT real. We must stand against it. Step back, analyze the situation, research it, be patient with ourselves as we sort things out, and treat ourselves kindly. Never take on shame that doesn’t belong to us. Humanity is precious, and our sovereignty is essential. When fear comes through a person, entity, or government that wants us to control us, then we must question its validity.
Emotion and anxiety are not reliable indicators for testing if the things we fear are real. In dreams we may fear things that are not dangerous. That is true of our waking self as well. So we must use logic, facts, accounts from trusted sources, and stories relayed by fellow human beings who have nothing to gain by sharing their truth.
We must also trust ourselves, beyond our emotional self. Intuition is more than a feeling. It is defined as the ability to acquire knowledge without (or maybe ahead of) the evidence, conscious reasoning, etc. to properly analyze the situation as fact. Psychologists recognize intuition as nothing magical, but rather a way in which our minds generate “hunches” in our unconscious minds. It is referred to as a type of knowledge.
Spiritual people have much more to say about the power of intuition. They may refer to it as the voice of your true self, your highest self, or even the voice of the Holy Spirit. Humans have acknowledged and defined intuition in many ways, and hold dear the idea that intuition is meant to help us know what is true. It is mean to protect us from bad things.
When our intuition seems to shout, “Pray NOW”, stop and pray. When our intuition says, “Don’t go that way today, take another route”, do it. There are so many stories of people who mysteriously felt an urgent tug on their hearts to go a different route and avoided a tragic end. Others tell of going a different route and being on the scene to save a life. We may never know why we are meant to go here, or not go there, but often we recognize immediately why we were “told” in our hearts to do something, or not do something. The important thing is to pay attention to what our intuition tells us, and do it.
When the world feels surreal… when things don’t look quite right… when something is off, and we have trouble sorting out the distortion from reality… when we don’t know who is lying, and who is telling the truth… when we don’t know what to fear, or how much to fear… we must trust our intuition.
Often, a flood is just a hole. There is a remedy. All will be well. When our intuition says, “Do not fear”, we must remain strong, steady, healthy, and positive. We will endure. We will persevere. We will live fearlessly.
Like this blog? Please subscribe to receive e-mail when there’s something new.
Inside this big picture, there are many smaller pictures. Each predator and prey pair shows how the natural world operates. Should that not include humankind? Of course it does. But we must not lose heart or surrender to the fate of defenseless prey.
“There are times when it seems the predators always win, but that’s not true. There is a time and season for everything. When we get discouraged, perhaps we can think about the beauty of God’s beasts, fowl, and fishes. His divine plan is mysterious, and sometimes painful…But there’s always a larger picture, and we are part of it. We are not forgotten. Not unwelcome. We are loved.”
As our world continues to be a chaotic scene, may we not be so distracted by the many battles, that we don’t see the big picture, the larger scene. It’s hard to see the forest, the mountain ridge, the sea, the green landscape, or the sky when battles rage. But if we step back and look at this world as a whole, we will see that our home is a beautiful place to be.
Not everyone is “bad”, and not everyone is “good”. Most of us are just trying to muddle through, learning how to live and love the best that we can. No matter how much destruction we see, we can focus on creation. No matter how much malice we see, we can focus on love. No matter how many enemies we see, we can focus on friends.
Like this blog? Please subscribe to receive e-mail when there’s something new.
Watch me paint this dolphin in 2 minutes (time lapse)
What is the pursuit of happiness? Does it mean simply “feeling” happy, or actively living happily? A dolphin in the wild is playful and enjoys following boats, showing off for human audiences. I loved meeting this delightful dolphin named “Fungie” when I was living in Ireland. Unless captured, a dolphin answers to no authority and is free to pursue happiness. Apparently Fungie liked hanging out with his human fans. It seemed like he was looking and smiling directly at me, and stole my heart!
But there is something horribly wrong when a human being feels less free than a wild dolphin. “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness,” seems like a good declaration for independence, for sovereignty over our bodies and our lives, and for the promise of freedom to follow our purpose, talents, vocations, lifestyles and dreams.
When governments and their “activist” proxies cancel some people but not others, when laws apply to some people but not others, when some of us are “essential” and others are not, when some of us can breathe free while others cannot, when some of us can travel, but others cannot, when some of us can work or go to school without restriction, while others cannot, are we free to pursue happiness? Have we declared our independence? Instead of looking wistfully at us from behind a glass aquarium wall in captivity, perhaps a wild dolphin observes us looking at him wistfully… wishing we too were on the other side of captivity.
Like this blog? Please subscribe to receive e-mail when there’s something new.
Watch me paint this deer in 2 minutes (time lapse)
You might remember when I shared this painting in April, while it was still fresh on my canvas? This art is a good choice for today’s blog post. Peace and tranquility are part of nature. Does “nature” include human nature? Why not?
Humans are complex beings. As a result, we often overthink things. We can be easily out of balance. Mind, body, and spirit can be skewed too heavily by our thoughts while our bodies and spirits are neglected. When this happens, the stress, worries, and fears that are generated by processing world, community, and personal daily events will dominate us. There is no peace in chaos when we can only see the chaos.
There is no doubt that these are troubled times, but every generation has its share of trouble. Even in extreme chaos, danger, oppression, and war, it is possible to achieve spiritual peace. It helps to study the philosophy, lifestyle habits and beliefs of peaceful people. What traits do such people have in common? What can we observe and attempt to bring into our own lives? How does spiritual peace help us survive hardships and oppression?
Spiritual peace creates strength that is resistant to propaganda, manipulation, steering, and more overt coercion. People who have a peaceful spirit often share these things in common:
Spending regular time outdoors
Eating nutritious fresh foods
Getting regular physical exercise (this can be from daily tasks, not necessarily a planned fitness routine- an active lifestyle may be enough)
Sleeping well, playing well, loving well
Practicing a personal, intimate faith that one strongly believes in
Educating the mind (not just receiving whatever comes through the “news” or social media, but a real focused effort to learn something new, or to study a familiar subject in more depth, learning a new language, contemplating mathematical or scientific concepts, exploring philosophy/sociology/psychology, learning about botany/gardening/homesteading, etc.)
Notice that the first four items on the list are related to the BODY part of the mind/body/spirit equation. Often, if we are dispirited, depressed, anxious, short tempered, or if spiritual peace eludes us in any way, the cause can be traced to something physical. We may be simply overtired. We might be hungry- even if we’ve eaten. When our diets are terrible, we are deficient in the right nutrients to fill us up. We may have a chemical imbalance that can be helped by changing our diets, adding more physical exercise, and better sleeping habits.
These are things that we probably already know, but if you’re like me, you need a reminder to stay focused and on track. The next item on the list refers to spiritual health. It does no good to choose “nothing” or to let ourselves fall into a mindless ritual of religious practice. These things don’t empower us or inspire us. We must dedicate our hearts to an active belief and practice of our personal, deeply connected faith.
Last on the list is the MIND part of the mind/body/spirit equation. The mind drives us, and therefore we must keep it in check. We must make sure that other influences don’t hijack us. The best way to do this, is to take control of our minds by making our own choices about what to fill our brains with. Choose good things, and good things will result.
Learning a new language in the area of literal language (such as a foreign language, sign language, or Braille), or the language of art, music, or numbers, expands our minds while overtaking the “weeds” in our brains. Create new neural pathways by directing your brain toward enlightenment, empowerment, and encouragement. Seek good things and your brain will find them. Not only that, but our minds are capable of modifying our bodies and communicating our desires and habits to our physical self.
Scientists know about neural pathways. Do we know science? Dark powerful entities know science, and their motives for their usage of it are often profit based (profit may be financial, an exchange of power, or something more sinister). What if we were aware of how amazing we are, and took control over our mind, body, spirit?
Psychological warfare only works on a willing victim. If we are not victims, and not willing, this type of abuse doesn’t work on us. Lies have little influence over those who are confident in the truth and in our ability to reason, our skills in logical thinking, and our reliance upon intuition and faith over blind compliance to an authority. Protecting ourselves during these troubled times is about being strong. It is about peace in chaos.
Like this blog? Please subscribe to receive e-mail when there’s something new.
Watch me paint this sea turtle in less than 1 minute (time lapse)
The sea turtle in my oil painting is Matthew, a rescue animal at the marine center on Tybee Island. When I saw him he was fully recovered and swimming peacefully in his tank. Shortly after my visit he was released back to his ocean home.
Imagine if we could see Matthew now. What might he be doing, in the post-2020 dystopian world that mankind has created? Well, I imagine he’s still in a state of relaxation, swimming to his own rhythm regardless of worldly chaos, darkness, fear, malice, death, and oppression on the shore.
I saw a lot of debate about whether or not it’s OK to celebrate holidays such as Independence Day when we are hardly free at this point in time. But it is when we are enslaved the most when we must celebrate what it means to be free! When the chips are down, if we leave the table it means that we have accepted the loss. Accepting a loss of freedom is to submit to slavery.
Who desires us to stop celebrating? It’s sad that our own “side” (fellow humans who claim to wish to be free, sovereign over their bodies, choices, and homes) should align with the oppressive regimes and their mouthpieces! Shaming each other or being a voice of discouragement and despair is exactly the kind of drive toward hopelessness that abusing regimes desire. For when we are without hope, we will comply and submit. We will give up that which makes us independent and free. We will enslave ourselves.
I do not comply.
I do not submit.
I celebrate my God given rights,
and I hope that you do too.
If you missed my spectacular 4th of July variety show, in which I laid my heart on the table; and my family also committed their time and talents to the project… please watch. It may inspire you to celebrate, even when it seems as if there is nothing to rejoice over. In my show I also share my personal American story, a story that should be relatable in general, no matter which country you call home.
No ruler, king, or evil empire of technocracy can create laws or commit illegal actions over our spirit. If we are spiritually like Matthew the sea turtle, we can live by our own rhythm no matter how grim the state of the world is. There is no compliance officer who can force our hearts to be hopeless. Choosing peace, joy, and love is always our right. I celebrate this freedom.
